My name is Dawn Marie Roeder and I am a survivor of sudden loss of a loved one. One of the most difficult things I found along my journey of healing were the amount of feelings I could feel at the same time. Very often I had found myself feeling dismay, anxiety, dread, emptiness, panic, fear, sadness, hurt and helpessness, to name a few, at the same time. When I learned through a grief group I attended that this is a normal reaction to trauma and loss I was relieved to discover that I was not losing my mind. Many others who have lost a loved one often feel many emotions at the same time.
A brief summary of my own sudden loss begins in mid-January of 2000 when I began to take a prescription medication to treat ADHD. By mid March, through my doctor’s care, the medication I was taking had been raised in dosage to its level of efficacy. Unfortunately for me and my son the “effect” turned out deadly when I had become delusional and began to hallucinate as a result of the amphetamine based drug. Nathaniel and I were in a terrible car accident in which he died.